nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Randomize
