drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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