he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize