i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize
