I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
