found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize