well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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