what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Randomize