This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize