But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize