Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
