Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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