He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize