he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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