well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
