I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
That accounts for only three of the penises
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
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