can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize
