i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize