Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
