i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize
