i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
How naked do you want me to be?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
