Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
