ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
