I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
