You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
