She said her name was "party"
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
