So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
