so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
my liver is dry heaving
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize
