All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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