I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Randomize