But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize
