so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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