I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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