Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Randomize