Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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