...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
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