just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
