batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize