You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I FOUND THE LEGS
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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