So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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