2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Randomize