I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Randomize