I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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