It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
