why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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