i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Randomize
