dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Randomize
