what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
