I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
