I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
