Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I need to sanitize my soul.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
