And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I lost the right to judge tonight
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize