i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize
